Tons of Fun Burger

Jeff Hinshaw

Jeff Hinshaw

April 16, 2009 12:00 AM EDT

You know what's tons of fun? No, I mean REALLY tons of fun? The tons of fun burger, of course! You may be wondering, "What's a tons of fun burger"? Well, I'll tell ya! It's awesome! That's what! Pretty much, if you take lots of awesome and lots of fun and put it on a burger, you have a tons of fun burger. Okay, let me explain a little more. You see, a few weeks ago, during Spring Break, I went with my church to a puppet festival. After the first day at this festival/competition, we went out and ate at the Cheesecake Factory. I don't know if you've ever been to the Cheesecake Factory, but that place is amazing! Last year we went, I remember someone ordered a small salad. Well, when they came back with it, it was huge! It was like the size of... of... um... this pillow I'm sitting on? You know, I really don't know what to compare it to, but that's not important. The point is that this small salad was freakin' huge! I wonder how big their large salad is...

"Excuse me, I'll have the large salad."

"... Come with me."

And then they would take you to this room where in the middle sat the biggest bowl of salad you could ever imagine!

Anyways, now about this tons of fun burger... Now last year, I saw on their menu a 'tons of fun burger'. I was quite curious on what this burger was. Now, I didn't get it that year, but I decided that the next year I would buy it and try it. Well, a year passed and I was ready to order this thing! The description sounded awesome! Double patties, double cheese, triple sesame seed bun, lettuce, pickles, tomato, onion, and secret sauce! (I don't think I'm forgetting anything.) Doesn't that sound awesome? Awesomely fun! Well, when I got this thing, it was a lot bigger than I expected! This thing put the Big Mac to shame! I was in awe of how much fun I was about to have! I looked at it, then picked it up and took my gigantic first bite! It was sooo good! And so much fun! The only problem was it was too much fun. So fun that I could not finish it! Too much fun for one person or for one night! But let me tell you, even though I didn't finish it, it was worth every $10.95 I spent on it! Next year, I'm definitely buying it again! I remember where it was... middle of the tenth page... next year, I'm finishing that sucker. Because that thing is awesomely fun! I had fun with the tons of fun burger, now it's your turn!

Tons of Fun Burger
The beastly tons of fun burger!